I felt another gush and learned that my water did in fact break so I called my parents totally forgetting the time and my mother answered the phone "what is wrong." I told her that she had to come down as my water broke. Her "omg's" woke up my father. Larry called his parents who headed to us to take us to the hospital. I called my sister forgetting, again, the hour but remembered my night-owl brother-in-law who I told and I swear I heard him smile through the phone. Not sure if it is a smile that defines me as nuts or pride but whatever.
Roy said call "9 1 1" but Larry had called his parents instead. I called my OB/GYN who's service said to go to the hospital and as I was changing the on-call doctor called and said "yes your water broke, yes that was the plug. Your son is certainly in a hurry so I'll meet you there."
So I finally get the courage to exit the bathroom, only because it is the only one and Larry announced he needed it. I changed out of my favorite nightgown and got into outside clothes. Very weird feelings were hitting me but more of "I'm not ready to be a mom" terror was slowly gripping me. Its October 20th and Peter wasn't scheduled to show up until November 14th.
My inlaws showed up with their minivan. I cringed because I hadn't had the courage to tell them I couldn't get in and out of their car up until then. I lifted one leg in to hoist me in and as fate would have it a labor pain hit, so as graceful as one could I collapsed half in and half out of the van laughing as I hear Bill Cosby say "whoa" in his "himself" monologue style.
Bill Cosby, Himself, "Childbirth"
My father in law, god bless him, made it to the hospital in record time and although I was quiet throughout the trip the labor pains started to hurt. I slid out of the car and barely made it to a dry wheelchair, it was raining that night.
Got up to Labor and Delivery and they started to prep me. I got into one of those gowns that never seem to fit no matter how anorexic you are and a I got into the bed a stronger contraction hit and I think Larry winced. I was 50% dialated. Not happy but they rushed me into the delivery room to give me my local and spinal block. Nothing like fighting a full blown panic attack as you start to feel paralyzed from the groin down.
Larry comes in and I try to meditate as the panic attacks are getting stronger as I feel like I'm losing control. He settles down at my head and all I want him to do is shut up because he is distracting me, sorry honey. Larry and I both wonder when will the doctor finally start and with that the doctor on the other side of the curtain said "you are about to feel pressure as I remove your son."
I feel pressure, sorta like someone sitting on your belly, and then I hear a very loud and ticked off cry. First it was Peter and then Larry. I'm numb. My son, my miracle, is born at 10:10 a.m. nearly 4 1/2 weeks early.
I didn't get to hold him right away, did get to kiss him but he was wisked to the NICU. Peter was brought upstairs and I'm sewn up. It wasn't until nearly 9:30 p.m. until I can see him. However once I'm in my room I have to get up and sit in the chair to show I can go see my son. It took a lot of courage and pain pills but I did it because I wanted to bond with my son.
My nurse said "boy you are determined, you will have your son for life whats the rush." "11 years of trying and one miracle later, you'd be in a hurry too." She took my blood pressure (140/80) and broke the speed limit to get me upstairs.
With Peter's feeding tube, C-pap, and various wires blocking my full view, my heart jumped into my throat and I fell in love with a 6 pound 12 ounce, 19 inch, strawberry blond little boy. I was still scared but I knew I would do my best.
No comments:
Post a Comment